Barbra Gentry-Pugh

LET IT GO! LOOK IN THE MIRROR Self-Confrontation: When God Shows Me, Me

August 30, 2026

“Search me, O God, and know my heart; Try me and know my anxious thoughts; And see if there be any hurtful way in me, and lead me in the everlasting way.” Psalms 139:23-24 (NASB)

Sometimes the hardest person to confront is the person staring back at us in the mirror. It is much easier to recognize what someone else needs to change. We can identify their attitude, unforgiveness, pride, impatience, anger, and poor decisions.

We can even find the Scripture that addresses their problem(s)! But what happens when God turns the mirror around? What happens when, instead of allowing us to examine everyone else, God says: “Now, let’s look at you.”

Years ago, I enrolled in a biblical counseling course called BC-1 – Self-Confrontation at New Hope Missionary Baptist Church. Before enrolling, I attended a banquet sponsored by Christian Research and Development where the Biblical Counseling Program was presented.

I had recently graduated from seminary, and I had absolutely no intention of signing up for another class, writing another paper, taking another exam, or doing any more research! Yes, I knew that the Word of God is inexhaustible. I loved learning and understood the importance of continued spiritual growth, but I thought my continued learning would happen on my time and on my terms. So, I thought!

From reviewing the course material, I entered BC-1 expecting to learn biblical principles and precepts that would help me counsel and minister more effectively to others. I did learn those things. But before God used the material to help me understand how to minister to someone else’s heart, He used it to confront mine.

Week after week, God’s Word became a mirror. I began recognizing attitudes, responses, motives, and patterns within myself that needed examination. Some things needed correction. Some needed repentance, and some simply needed greater spiritual maturity. The class was teaching me how to help others biblically, but God was simultaneously teaching me something far more personal!

Before I could effectively confront what is happening in someone else’s life, I must be willing to allow God to confront what is happening in mine. That realization changed me. Not because I became perfect. I didn’t. Not because I suddenly had everything figured out. I didn’t. But because I began learning the importance of regularly asking God a difficult but necessary question: “Lord, what do You want to change in me?”

Years later, I now have the privilege of teaching that same BC-1 – Self-Confrontation course. And as I stood before a new class this past week, I was reminded again of what those principles taught me. I am not teaching because I have mastered self-confrontation. I am teaching because I have experienced its necessity. And I am still looking in the mirror when God turns the mirror around.

Self-Confrontation is the process of honestly examining our own hearts, attitudes, motives, and actions in the light of God’s truth. It is allowing the Word of God and the Holy Spirit to expose what is inconsistent with Christ so that repentance, renewal, and transformation can take place. Self-Confrontation says:

Before I blame ~ I examine.
Before I accuse ~ I examine.
Before I correct ~ I examine.
Before I tell someone else what God says ~ I ask what God is saying to me.

That is not self-Condemnation. There is a difference. Self-Condemnation says, “Look at how terrible I am.” Self-Confrontation says, “Lord, show me what You see so that I can become more like Christ.” This leaves us staring at ourselves. The other leads us back to God.

David understood this when he prayed: “Search me, O God, and know my heart; Try me and know my anxious thoughts; And see if there be any hurtful way in me, And lead me in the everlasting way.” Psalms 139:23-24 (NASB)

Notice what David did not pray. He didn’t say: “Lord, search my neighbor.” “Search my spouse.” “Search my children.” “Search that person who offended me.” He said: “Search ME.” That’s self-confrontation.

The Mirror of God’s Word. James gives us another powerful picture. God’s Word functions like a mirror. A physical mirror reveals what is already there. It doesn’t create the condition; it reveals it. Likewise, when Scripture exposes pride, bitterness, unforgiveness, selfishness, fear, jealousy, anger, or disobedience in us, God’s Word did not put those things there.

The Word of God simply revealed what was already in the heart. And that’s where the challenge begins. Imagine looking into your bathroom mirror in the morning and noticing something that needs attention, but instead of doing something about it, you walk away saying: “That’s just how I am.”

We would think that was ridiculous. Yet spiritually, that is exactly what we often do. God shows us something through His Word. We recognize it, and we may even agree with it, and yet we walk away unchanged.

James warns us against being hearers of the Word without becoming doers of the Word. The purpose of the mirror isn’t merely to show us ourselves. It is to give us the opportunity to do something about what we see in ourselves.

Let It Go! And perhaps this is where self-confrontation intersects with our Let It Go journey. For weeks we have talked about releasing things that weigh down the heart. But here’s a difficult question:

What if the next thing I need to let go of is something in ME, or something in YOU? Maybe I need to let go of my need to always be right. My tendency to blame. My defensiveness. My excuses. My pride. My habit of rehearsing someone else’s faults while minimizing my own. My insistence that “If they would change, then I could be different.”

Jesus gives us an unforgettable picture in Matthew 7:3-5 when He speaks about noticing the speck in another person’s eye while ignoring the plank in our own. Jesus was not teaching us never to help another person. He was teaching us about order. ME FIRST. Examine yourself first, confront yourself first, and allow God to correct you first. Then you will be able to see clearly enough to help someone else.

Self-Confrontation Is Not the Destination! There is one more truth we cannot miss. God doesn’t reveal what’s wrong with us merely so that we can feel bad about ourselves. Conviction has a destination. Lamentations 3:40 says: “Let us search and try our ways, and turn again to the LORD.”

It is: Examine → Recognize → Repent → Return → Change. The goal of self-confrontation isn’t introspection for introspection’s sake. The goal is transformation!

God shows ME ME, not to destroy me, embarrass me, or condemn me, but to lovingly reveal what is interfering with the person He is transforming me to become. And sometimes the greatest obstacle to our healing isn’t what someone else has done. Sometimes it’s what we refuse to see in ourselves.

So perhaps our prayer this week should be one of the shortest, and most courageous prayers we can pray: “Lord, show me ME.” Then when He does, don’t defend it, don’t excuse it, don’t blame someone else for it, don’t run from the mirror. Confront it with God’s truth. Repent where necessary. Receive His grace. Allow Him to transform it. And then ~ LET IT GO!

Because sometimes Healing From Within begins when we stop asking God to change everybody around us and give HIM permission to change something within us. “Stop chasing symptoms; confront the root.” Sometimes we are asking God to change the fruit while refusing to confront the root.

This week’s devotional grew from principles taught in BC-1 – Self-Confrontation. When applied, can profoundly impact one’s spiritual growth. Don’t just read the Word and walk away from the mirror. Ask God for the courage to respond to what He shows you.

HEART CHECK: Sit quietly before God and ask: What is God showing me about ME? What attitude, motive, behavior, or pattern have I been reluctant to confront?

What do I need to confess?

What do I need to change?

What do I need to LET GO?

Then ask the most important question: “Lord, what would You have me do about what You have shown me?”

Remember: The mirror of God’s Word is not designed to shame us for what we see; it is designed to show us what God desires to change.

HEART CHALLENGE: Don’t Walk Away From the Mirror! This week, choose one thing God has revealed about your heart and prayerfully confront it. Don’t make your first response: “But they…” Instead, ask: “Lord, what about ME?” Find the Scripture that addresses what God has revealed. Write it down. Pray over it. Confess when necessary and identify one specific action of obedience you can take.

Then practice replacing the old response with a biblical one. BC-1 ~ Put Offs – Put Ons:

If God reveals pride ~ practice humility.
If He reveals unforgiveness ~ begin the process of forgiveness.
If He reveals blame ~ take responsibility for your part.
If He reveals anger ~ examine what is happening beneath it.
If He reveals fear ~ replace it with trust.
If He reveals disobedience ~ repent and obey.

Don’t merely admire the mirror. Respond to what it reveals.

GOD’S STANDING ORDERS/TREATMENT PLAN ~ The Master Physician’s Prescription For Life.  God’s Word is the prescription; our obedience is the administration. We must take a daily dose, never skip doses, and apply consistently!

The Master Physician’s Prescription for Self-Confrontation: God’s Word is the prescription; our obedience is the administration. We must take a daily dose, never skip doses, and apply consistently!

Standing Orders For The Heart

REQUEST A HEART EXAMINATION ~ Psalm 139:23–24
Pray regularly: “Search me, O God.” Give God permission to reveal what you may not recognize in yourself.”
EXAMINE YOUR WAYS ~ Lamentations 3:40.
Don’t simply examine what happened to you. Examine how you responded to what happened.
LOOK INTO THE MIRROR OF THE WORD ~ James 1:23–25
Read Scripture for more than information. Allow God’s Word to examine and transform you.
REMOVE YOUR PLANK FIRST ~ Matthew 7:3–5
Before focusing on someone else’s fault, prayerfully confront your own heart.
CONFESS WHAT GOD REVEALS ~ 1 John 1:9
When God exposes sin, don’t hide it, justify it, or rename it. Confess it and receive His forgiveness.
RENEW YOUR MIND ~ Romans 12:2
Replace old patterns of thinking with the truth of God’s Word.
REPEAT DAILY ~ 2 Corinthians 13:5
Self-confrontation is not a one-time spiritual procedure. Make self-examination a regular discipline.

Prescription Reminder: Don’t diagnose everyone else while refusing to examine yourself. The Master Physician already knows what’s in the heart. Our responsibility is to remain willing to say: “Lord, show me ME!”

LET’S PRAY: Father God, thank You for Your authoritative, inerrant, and inspired Word that gives us clear instructions for confronting ourselves, so our hearts and living lives honor You. Today we ask You to turn the mirror toward us. Search us, O God. Reveal the attitudes we have justified, the motives we have ignored, the behaviors we have excused, the wounds that influence our responses, and the areas where we have been more concerned about someone else’s faults than our own. Give us the courage to see ourselves through the truth of Your Word. When You reveal something within us that needs to change, keep us from becoming defensive. Keep us from blaming others. Keep us from making excuses. Give us a humble and teachable heart. Where there is sin, lead us to repentance. Where there is hurt, bring healing. Where there are unhealthy patterns, bring transformation. Where our thinking is contrary to Your Word, renew our minds. And Father, help us remember that Your correction is not rejection. You reveal what is within us because You love us too much to leave us unchanged. May we never become so skilled at examining others that we neglect the condition of our own heart. Today, our prayer is simple: Lord, show ME, ME! And when You do, give us the courage to confront it, the humility to confess it, the grace to release it, and the obedience necessary to change. Continue Your work of Healing From Within, so that our hearts, our character, our relationships, and our lives increasingly reflect the Lord Jesus Christ, in the Precious, Powerful, and Preeminent Name of Jesus Christ, our Savior and Lord. Amen.

d.docs.live.net/…/_Self-Confrontation ^F A Biblical Exploration.docx

FINAL THOUGHT: Before you ask God to change what’s around you, have the courage to ask Him what He wants to change within you. Look in the mirror. Listen to God. Respond to His Word. And when He shows you what needs to go ~ LET IT GO!